Minions Ship 00Q Too
by therunawaypen
Summary: The minions of Q branch knew that the Quartermaster and 007 were the perfect couple. They just had to wait for them to realize it too.


There was no doubt in anyone's mind that the Quartermaster and agent 007 of MI6 made an absolutely adorable couple. And no one knew it better than the so called "minions" of Q branch.

"Look how concerned he is about 007." They whispered as Q watched one of the 00 agent's missions go terribly wrong. The distressed expression, followed by one of utter relief when Bond pulled off a miracle, was a clear sign of the Quartermaster's affection for the man with a license to kill.

"Aww, 007 brought Q tea." They shared knowing glances when 007 walked into Q's office with a steaming mug of what was no doubt Earl Grey, as well as a tin of what looked like loose leaf tea the agent had picked up during his mission in China.

"In case you ever want to try something other than Earl Grey." The agent had told Q, giving him a smirk and a wink before leaving the office. The fact that the agent had thought of Q enough to get him a gift was a clear sign that the Quartermaster was on 007's mind. The fact Q went so far as to use up all the tea brought to him was a sign he cherished the agent's gifts.

"Just look at those kids." The minions were gathered around a computer screen, speaking in hushed whispers as they morphed the images of both the Quartermaster and 007 to see the genetic possibilities for their children. "They'll have gorgeous eyes."

The one holding the mouse chuckled, "Forget the eyes, just look at that hair! Q's curls alone will make for some adorable girls."

A woman to his left nodded, "Absolutely. They'll have to lock them up to keep the boys at bay."

"Yeah, but where would they get them?"

One of the more quiet girls grinned, "I sure wouldn't say no to being their surrogate." The other women murmured in agreement.

It was then that the Quartermaster returned from getting his morning cup of tea, "What's all the fuss over there?"

The program was quickly closed as the minions returned to their desks, denying that they had been doing anything of note. Q looked puzzled, but made no comment as he returned to his office to put together 007's equipment.

Yes, they were perfect together.

If only they were actually together.

It had become a key point of annoyance for the Q minions, watching those two dance around each other. In their minds, they were already a couple, the two just needed to realize it. On breaks, they would discuss how they thought the eventual realization of the relationship would occur (the common one being in Q's office, with the Quartermaster bent over his desk).

The minions also took the time to share their thoughts via their computers. Some of the more artistic ones had taken to sharing their artwork of their favorite couple with the rest of the minions, which were usually met with approving nods.

Whenever 007 came into Q branch, all eyes were on him as he entered Q's office, waiting for some cue that the agent intended to sweep the Quartermaster off his feet.

They were beginning to get impatient.

"Maybe Bond's relationships with women is getting in the way." One mentioned as the minions walked into MI6 for their usual shift.

Another one shrugged, "On Bond's part or Q's?"

"That's true," A petite woman nodded, "I can't see Q giving himself to someone who only did frivolous relationships."

"But Bond only sleeps with women on his missions." The first pointed out, swiping his access card. "Q knows that."

"Maybe Bond is actually hetero." A quiet one mentioned from the back of the group.

The group paused a moment to reflect, then dismissed the notion as nonsense. "When you live your life the way we do, I doubt any of us are strictly in favor of one gender over another." A woman with glasses nodded, opening the door to the Q branch.

Only to stop, along with the rest of the minions, at the sight before them.

Q was already in Q branch, and he wasn't alone. He and 007 were sprawled on the floor, locked in a heated embrace. The 00 agent's hand was tangled in Q's curls as he kissed his way down the Quartermaster's neck.

"_James.._" Q whispered, wrapping a leg around 007's waist, "_We can't…not here…_"

Bond didn't respond other than to pick up the Quartermaster and carry him into his office, never breaking contact with the neck he was ravaging.

Neither, it seemed, had noticed the minions coming in.

"Oh my god…" One whispered. "It finally happened…"

The broken silence was enough to get them all moving; rushing to their computers to access the security feeds.


End file.
